Jokes he Jokes

Please comments after reading

 

A man was sitting reading his papers when his wife hit him on the head with a frying pan.

'What was that for?' the man asked.

The wife replied 'That was for the piece of paper with the name Jenny on it that I found in your pants pocket'.

The man then said 'When I was at the races last week Jenny was the name of the horse I bet on'

The wife apologized and went on with the housework.

Three days later the man is watching TV when his wife bashes him on the head with an even bigger frying pan, knocking him unconscious.

Upon re-gaining consciousness the man asked why she had hit again.

Funny Doctor Jokes

A woman visited a Doctor.
Woman: Doctor, I have a problem. I am...

Doctor: I know your problem. You always dream that you have become a horse, right?

Woman: How do you know?!

Doctor: Your pony tail hair style.

Silly Doctor
Mr. Jones: Doctor, my son is having a problem.

He plugged up his ear and nose with chilies. Now he is screaming.

Doctor: That means he is not eating properly.

Silly Patient
Doctor: Here is the medicine. Take four spoons daily.

Patient: But I don’t have four spoons in house. Do I have to buy one?

Virtual University Vs Traditional teaching

Online education will become more prominent in the future; and Virtual University of Pakistan looking forward for its share in the pie, urging people to continue their educational growth by providing several methods of learning and up-to-date curriculum of latest education trends for example MBA. However, it won’t replace traditional learning but enhance it.

Live training is becoming more and more of a luxury these days. Many businesses and schools are turning to online learning for training and education because it is very cost effective, especially when you consider travel costs, and loss of work time. There are many reasons why online education will become more popular in the future. A positive aspect to online education is that one does not have to be in the physical space of a classroom. It allows people to take classes from anywhere they can access the Internet. “Life-long learning is becoming the norm, yet those seeking further education do not always have the time, flexibility, or mobility to attend traditional courses.”

Breaking the time/space barrier is a big reason why online learning is so revolutionary. More businesses will most likely take advantage of the online education in the Future. “Large Fortune-500 companies have all embarked on some form of online initiative, with a few setting up full-fledged virtual universities to impart training to their employees, partners and distributors”. (Krishnan) I think that these programs once designed will be a great way for companies to not only educate their employees with little man hours but also a great way to monitor their progress.

The potential of growth in the E-learning area is enormous. “E-learning has the potential to be the next killer application of the Net and in the words of John Chambers, CEO of Cisco, “the scale of network traffic generated by e-learning, will make today’s exchange of e-mail messages look like a rounding error”. With the increasing computer literacy around the world it will be seen as a great way to educate people because of the convenience and cost.

“Online education will grow because it meets the needs of new audience nontraditional students–and because it offers new approaches to old content-delivery issues. It won’t, however, replace educators, save tons of money, and eliminate the need for well maintained campus infrastructures (Reed).” The fact that online education will provide interactive and exciting new ways to deliver information is great.

“This is true of all the segments: K-12, graduate education, corporate training and continuing education. As we move to a connected and networked world, the Internet will become the primary tool for learning, suitably supported by the classroom and faculty (Krishnan).” It is necessary to accept the fact that Online Education is going to be around and a primary way of learning for a lot of people but only as a supplement for others.”

Ruth Clark said, sees these major trends in online learning: a return to the basics, and more interest in knowledge recycling and collaborative learning…and there is a trend away from high-end, custom-developed CD-ROM multimedia instruction.” I think that because you can do similar interactive pieces online they are moving away from CD-ROM’s. In online education, pictures, graphs, music and all of the interactive aspects make it very valuable and good way to learn for visual learners. Just having the Internet at your fingertips for searching is a huge resource.

In the future online learning will move towards simplicity and ease of use. “The next wave of online learning will provide freedom and guidance…online learners will receive customized help in muddling through rich options (Abernathy).” We are also moving towards a time of total integration. The learning support resources will be included and utilized in the applications.

Online Learning is a very exciting and growing field that will continue to grow and succeed in the future. Although it won’t replace traditional learning, it will become more prominent and useful.

SCOPE OF VIRTUAL UNIVESITY OF PAKISTAN

Education at VU is really a world-class as we can see same modules in LUMS, Yale, MIT & Howard. Instructors hired by VU are selected from Pakistani topnotch universities. That Includes Famous Assembly Teacher of NUST sir Bilal “Baoo Ji” there are many more.. Also read this:
“The ranking of top 100 universities belonging to the subcontinent was released by CCHS-CSIC, Spain, according to its “Webometrics Ranking of World Universities. In the subcontinent at least 16 Pakistani universities are on the list of top 100 universities. Out of which the Virtual University is ranked 10th. This reflects the growing awareness of the University. VU is engaged in providing international quality education in every corner of the country including the far flung areas by best faculty available in the country at a very affordable fee”

Blocking of LMS due to non-payment.......

All students are informed that the University is going to block the LMS of all those students who have not paid their fee so far w.e.f. June 01, 2011. It is therefore advised that please pay your outstanding dues at your earliest in order to avoid LMS blocking.

Final Trem Papers.....

you can download final papers at
http://www.vuaskari.com/
http://www.vuhelp.com/
http://www.vurs.net/

AAAnnnnSSSSoooooo.............

Ansoo her khushi or ghum mein insaan ka saath detein hein,
Ansoo? bahane se dil ka boejh halka hota hai,
Ansoo? khushi ke moqe per bhi nikle ate hein or khshi ka izhaar karte hein,
Ansoo? dost bichRne per ankhoun se moteoun ki tarah behne lagte hein,
Ansoo? se pyar karo kiun ke yeh bin mange mil jate hein
dard kitne hain bata nahi sakta zakhm kitne hain dikha nhai sakta
ankhon se samjh sako to samjh lo ansoon gire hain kitne gina nahi
sakta

eTechy...........

A new article has been posted on eTechy101.com.
The post title is 'XML with DTD: Advancement in Web Documentation'. Below is a
preview of the post.

DTD (Document Type Definition) is a scripting language used to define the legal
building blocks of an XML document. It further defines the document structure
with a list of legal elements and attributes. Scripting in DTD requires a prior
knowledge of XML. A DTD can be declared inline inside an XML document, or as an
external reference. Following is an example of internal DTD declaration:

You may view the full post at
http://www.etechy101.com/programming/xml-with-dtd-advancement-in-web-documentation.html